“Sometimes the light’s all shinin’ on me,
Other times I can barely see,
Lately it occurs to me, What a long, strange trip it’s been.”
-Lyrics for “Truckin’” by Jerry Garcia of The Grateful Dead
These lyrics make me smile, almost laugh (almost!), as they describe the journey I have been on these last couple of years all too well. It has, indeed, been a long, strange ride…and as with most of life’s strange rides, we almost always end up somewhere we had no idea we were going to. If only we could remember this at the onset of the ride! That somehow, no matter how long, winding, arduous, or exhausting the road is…it most assuredly is leading us somewhere. So, we keep on truckin’.
Which, fortunately, I am doing with much more health, energy, and vigor today. I am not back up to the level I would like to be…but I am deeply grateful for the level of restored health and well-being I am experiencing.
And I have so missed this wonderful place, where thoughts and words swirl with meaning and life and energy…igniting more thought, more words, and connection and healing. I had to go into a sort of seclusion during this journey of the dark night of the soul, and at times had thought I had lost my words. But sometimes going within…way within…is a necessary path. I had to embrace that path and follow it in order to get to the next turn…not resist it, which of course I initially wanted to do. But resistance only slows the walk on the path…so I turned around and trod that path with all my might, and lo and behold!, I arrived somewhere!
I think the thing we lose sight of the most, when going through difficulties, is that…there IS a destination at the end of the path. We do not go through difficulties and end up…nowhere. There really is a different reality beyond the difficulty.
The thing is…we can’t possibly see what that reality will be because whatever the difficulty we are experiencing will change us along the way. It is meant to change us…for out of adversity comes strength and clarity and direction. Adversity challenges us to see ourselves and what we are going through differently than before. It dares us to see our lives and what is in them through a different perception…so how could that not change us? What we need do is know that change is ultimately good. It can be terrible and frightening, but that too shall pass, and as all things do, it will morph into something else. And we will live through those moments…flowing on to the next…and on, and on…
I look forward to these next moments…and coming back here to catch up on your lives and thoughts…and perhaps share a few more of my own.
Much Love and Gratitude to all of you who have continued to read the blog and ask about me. It is astounding to see traffic still flowing here…it makes my heart pound and my pulse quicken with pleasure and surprise.
I Wish Everyone Love, Light, and Happiness.
From My Heart To Yours.